Claire

Labor story

2009-07-11T17:26:00.005-04:00

Now that Claire's here, I'll be shutting down this blog and going back to posting just on my main one -- until next time I'm pregnant, anyway. I thought I'd close this one out with the details of how labor and delivery (or should I say extraction?) went down. Be warned: This could cross the line into TMI territory; those who prefer to think Claire arrived via stork might prefer to read this version.

Claire's Arrival: A Timeline

Tuesday, June 30
An ordinary day. Work, Chick-fil-A lunch, new tires on the car.

8 p.m. - I go out for drinks (well, water) and appetizers with Libba, Amy and Heather to celebrate Heather's birthday. I tell them how sure I am Claire's going to go past her July 8 due date.

Midnight - We're asleep.

Wednesday, July 1
3 a.m. - I wake up to use the bathroom and find that I seem to be experiencing a slow but steady trickle of something. I'm pretty sure it's not urine. I realize it's July 1 and say "rabbit." I google "amniotic fluid," learn that your water doesn't always break in a gush like you see in the movies, and that it smells like diluted bleach. I call Labor and Delivery at the hospital to get their opinion. They tell me to come on in.

3:15 a.m. - I wake up Matt, tell him we have to go to the hospital but it could be a false alarm, and we both take showers. We throw together a hospital bag. My car (with the baby seat) was supposed to be left at the office overnight, but Matt had switched it out with a Kirby Explo' while picking up dinner, unbeknownst to me. Good move.

3:45 a.m. - The hospital confirms that my water's broken and we get checked in. I'm only 1.5 cm. dilated and can't feel any contractions. They start a penicillin drip since I tested positive for group B strep. We walk around and around and around and around the halls.

5:30 a.m. - The on-call doctor tells me I should think about taking Pitocin soon to speed things up. I tell him I'd rather give things a chance to progress on their own first.

6-9 a.m. - We call our families and send out a mass "We're in labor!" email. People start showing up at the hospital.

1 p.m. - After numerous rounds of walking the halls, I'm having definite contractions and feel confident things are progressing. The doctor who's now on call checks me and I'm only 2 cm. dilated. (Believe me, this was discouraging.) He strongly recommends that I take Pitocin to hurry things up. They like to deliver within 18 hours of the water breaking, but within 12 hours if the mother tested positive for group B strep, so what they consider the ideal window for delivery is shrinking. I agree to Pitocin and the pain reliever Fentanyl. The nurse tells us to plan on a 10 p.m. or midnight delivery.

5 p.m. - My Fentanyl runs out, but the Pitocin, which is on a continuous drip, keeps going. The labor and delivery floor is slammed (one person pushing, two dilated to 9, one in pre-term labor at 27 weeks, and two who were in car accidents and need constant attention) and the nurses can't get to me immediately. The contractions are intense.

6 p.m. - I get the second dose of Fentanyl and also request an epidural. (I went into labor not feeling that strongly either way about epidurals -- I wasn't assuming I'd have one, but wasn't going to beat myself up over it if I decided to.)

7 p.m. - The Pitocin is working -- I'm dilated to 5. I get the epidural and immediately am so glad I did. I tell Matt to remind me of this during future childbirths. I requested a low-dose, or "walking," epidural, but our hospital doesn't provide these. So I get the full dose, but it's what I was hoping for with a low-dose one: definite pain relief, but I can still feel all the contractions, and my legs aren't numb. I can wiggle my toes, lift my hips and could walk if I weren't hooked up to so many drips and the fetal monitor. I'm starting to REALLY feel the effects of three hours' sleep on top of no food except crackers, chicken broth and Jell-O since the cheese fries I split with the girls the night before.

8 p.m. - The nurse tells us labor is not imminent. Matt tells the waiting room crowd they can stick around if they want but nothing will be happening soon, probably. Everyone leaves except for Mom and Dad.

11:30 p.m. - I start to feel lots of pressure very low in my pelvis. It doesn't feel like the regular contractions. Matt calls the nurse, who says I'm 9.5 cm. dilated and the baby is way low. She starts preparations for pushing and Matt goes out to tell Mom and Dad. We think maybe we'll have a July 1 baby after all (HA!).

Thursday, July 2
12:30 a.m. - I am fully dilated. The nurse tells Matt he can tell Mom and Dad to order us some post-delivery food, which they do, in case we don't deliver before the cafeteria closes (at 1 a.m. or 2 a.m., I can't remember). She says she thinks we'll be holding Claire in less than an hour. When Matt gets back I start pushing.

1 a.m. - I can feel the contractions, and the nurse is wonderful about coaching me about when and how to push. Between contractions she is massaging my perineum to hopefully prevent tearing. She can see Claire's head and tells us she has a ton of hair.

2:30 a.m. - After an hour and a half, nothing has changed. I keep pushing, we try different positions, the nurse keeps massaging. Claire just can't get past the pelvic bone. I'm getting exhausted and very frustrated and would do anything for some food. The epidural is starting to wear off.

3:15 a.m. - Still nothing. Now there's talk of episiotomies and vacuums. I'm getting more worn out and frustrated with every futile push. I know I can't push any harder, and I start to worry we're going to end up with an emergency C-section, especially because of how long it's been since my water broke (24 hours). The doctor comes in, armed with scissors and a vacuum. I don't care anymore if it means we can avoid a C-section.

3:30 a.m. - I feel delirious, and am frustrated practically to the point of hysteria, because I've been pushing with every bit of my strength and I have nothing left. The epidural is done. The pain is beyond anything I ever imagined I would experience, and it all seems to be for naught, because Claire just is not coming out. I tell everyone I can't keep going, but they refuse to let me quit so I rally, but it's not pretty.

3:46 a.m. - It's a miracle! On the third try, the vacuum works and Claire's head pops out. It turns out she was "sunny-side up," or in the posterior position -- her head was facing up at birth -- which is why getting past the pelvic bone was all but impossible. The umbilical cord is wrapped around her neck, but just loosely, so I stop pushing for a minute while the doctor untangles it. The rest of her body seems to just slide out after all that.4:15 a.m.ish - Claire is cleaned up, the doctors have given her the thumbs-up, and I get to nurse her. I have no idea what I'm doing, but she does -- she latches right on.

5:15 a.m. - The doctor finishes stitching up my fourth-degree tears. Mom and Dad, who have been in the waiting room nearly 24 hours, come in to meet her.

5:30 a.m. - I drink a Coke and take a hot bath. Thanks to the combination of heat plus blood loss plus still no food, I pass out when I'm trying to stand up, but I knew it was coming -- that tell-tale ringing in the ears -- so Matt and a couple of nurses are there to catch me. After a cold shower and ammonia I come around and we move to the room where we'll stay that night.

The whole experience was brutal, but amazingly, it took only about five days for me to feel basically 100 percent (although I haven't tried running yet) and to forget how bad it really was.Small wonder.

Hurry up and wait

2009-06-29T14:44:00.005-04:00

Claire must be pretty comfortable in there. Today's 39-week appointment revealed no dilation and still only 50 percent effacement (unchanged for a few weeks). Her heart rate remains excellent as does her movement, and the doctor said she's sitting very low, which I already knew since I feel like I'm driving with a basketball in my lap lately.

I know I've had the easiest pregnancy in the world and I still feel great, but I'm getting so impatient to meet her! The doctor said they'll probably want to discuss inducing at next Tuesday's appointment if I make it that far -- which I bet I will. Unless I'm just oblivious, I haven't even had any Braxton Hicks contractions, much less the real deal. And the "gory details" I've been so excited (yet repulsed) by for the past week are totally normal and don't necessarily mean labor's right around the corner, the doctor said. I guess I should just be glad they're not atypical.

I pleaded for a guess as to when I might go into labor and all he would say is 10 percent of women deliver early, 10 percent deliver late, and the rest are within a few days of the due date. A non-answer to an impossible question, I realize.

Without us asking (I hadn't decided if I wanted to), the doctor said he normally would have stripped my membranes this morning but he didn't because of the group B strep. So ... the wait continues.

14ish more days!

2009-06-24T13:39:00.005-04:00

Here's the 38-week shot. She's about the size of a watermelon now and that's pretty much what it looks like.
Without getting into the gory details, I'm more optimistic now than I was a few days ago that Claire's birth, if not exactly imminent, could be on the sooner side. I moved my doctor's appointment from next Thursday to next Monday so I don't have to wait so long for confirmation. :) I also spent from 2-4 a.m. yesterday (when I got ahead of myself and thought I might be on the verge of labor -- newbie mistake) finishing my one remaining article that was due by July 1. Now that that's turned in, I don't have any work responsibilities that someone else couldn't do for me if necessary, which is nice.

Running has actually gotten easier in the past week or so, for a few reasons, I think: I've switched to the treadmill, so I'm not fighting 90-degree heat; I can wear fewer clothes -- more comfortable as well as good for temperature control -- since I'm at home and don't have to worry about whether my belly's covered (it never is anymore); I'm accompanied by my iPod, which I rarely take on outdoor runs; and I tell myself (regardless of whether it's true) that every run is nudging me closer to finally meeting Claire.

Nursery is ready, baby is not

2009-06-22T15:21:00.007-04:00

Today we went to the doctor again, for the 38-week appointment -- it seems like we spend all our time there lately -- and met the one doctor we hadn't seen yet. I'm now measuring at about 37 weeks and Claire's heart rate is still great but there's been no progress on the dilation front -- 1/2 cm., if anything, the doctor said. I figured that would be the case since I haven't had any contractions or other signs of labor.

I'm impatient to meet her but another week or so to tie up loose ends with work stuff would be really nice. After that I'll probably start researching DIY induction techniques -- lots of running, lots of sex, maybe a little castor oil a la Melissa.

We finally have at least ordered everything, I think, that we really should have before she arrives. A diaper pail, for example. Some of it might not beat her to our house, but at least it's on its way.

Also, we're probably finished with the nursery. We might add something to the wall over her crib if the mood strikes, but both of us prefer blank walls to walls decorated with things we don't like -- and I'm pretty sure Claire will be cool with whatever.

This is about half of her stuffed-animal collection. The others are in the basket by the crib. My great-aunt Clara made this awesome quilt -- just one of many great blankets people have given us.

I love this for both the sentimental value and the gorgeous frame, which you can't really see in this picture. Terry cross-stitched it for one of the boys in 1981 and she gave it to us at the last shower.

I was kind of ambivalent about whether we should get a glider, and if so which one, but Matt did the research and this one exceeds all expectations. Very, very comfortable.

Baby girl clothes are fun to buy. So I hear. I have yet to buy her a single item of clothing, and now you know why. Not that I'm complaining.

Dresser plus changing pad. All the diapering stuff is in these drawers, and when the diaper pail finally does get here, we'll probably scoot over the dresser to make room.

This dresser holds a ton of miscellaneous stuff -- socks, shoes, various blankets, nursing accessories, etc.

These are pages from some of my favorite children's books. Three of them are obvious (Clifford, the Very Hungry Caterpillar and Dr. Seuss), but if anyone outside of my immediate family can identify what book the page framed at top left is from, I'll be impressed and know we were meant to be friends.

Matt and I couldn't find a memo board we liked so we made this ourselves. It was actually fun and I love how it turned out. Kate, guess which card is Matt's favorite? That's right.

Belly bump picture coming soon, for real this time!

Counting down

2009-06-15T14:21:00.004-04:00

Another doctor's appointment today, the 37-week one. I never got around to taking a 36-week bump picture so I think I'll skip and just do a 37-week one in two days. Today the measurements were right at about 36 weeks (3 cm. more than last week). Apparently I didn't necessarily grow that much in the past week; the doctor said the numbers can vary depending on the baby's position. Claire's heart rate was still good and strong. They didn't check for dilation or effacement because I haven't had any contractions.

I did find out that my group B strep infection test came back positive (they took the sample last week). It's not a big deal, just means I'll probably take penicillin during labor to prevent it from being passed on to Claire.

Betsy took this picture while she was in town last week. Not very glamorous -- I have a crooked linea nigra, a temporarily deformed belly button and a blob of weirdness above it (site of an ill-advised belly-button ring that lasted all of three months in high school) -- but I still like the picture.

Surprise ultrasound

2009-06-10T16:24:00.004-04:00

Yesterday we had our 36-week appointment and for once there was a little excitement. We saw a doctor we hadn't seen before (we'll be rotating among them for the next few weeks since who delivers Claire depends on who's on call; this way we'll at least have met all of the doctors). He measured me at 33 cm., which was a centimeter smaller than I measured at my last appointment (when I measured right on at 34 cm./34 weeks). The centimeters are supposed to match how many weeks pregnant you are.

He said the change could a) mean the baby had dropped or b) indicate I was losing amniotic fluid, which would be bad, and he ordered an ultrasound for later in the afternoon to see which it was. Matt was pumped about that because he was kind of nervous all along that we weren't going to have an ultrasound between the sex-discovery one and the birth, which I guess does seem like a long time. I was excited because I thought we'd be able to see her face, which we did, but you couldn't tell anything about her features except that they're there. We weren't worried because her heart rate was good, she was moving great, and if there was a problem with the amniotic fluid, they could have delivered her immediately if needed and she would have been fine.

The ultrasound went well -- all the measurements are right on and there's plenty of amniotic fluid -- which means the baby has dropped, yay! I'm also 50 percent effaced but not at all dilated. And according to the ultrasound, she weighs 6 pounds, give or take 14 ounces, which, granted, is a big margin of error. They say she's gaining half an ounce a day now (more on the days I work at home and eat pink jellybeans for eight straight hours), so she's on target to be a good, healthy weight -- not too big, not too small.
I owe the blog a 36-week-bump picture. Probably it will come tomorrow, because I think the camera's at the office.

Part 2: Doctors and the bump

2009-05-28T17:51:00.008-04:00

(Part 1 is here.)

3. For the past few weeks I'd been feeling like I needed to crack my lower back but couldn't because my stomach was in the way. It was affecting the way I ran but wasn't exactly painful, definitely nothing I couldn't run through and nothing that bothered me when I wasn't running. At the same time I was noticing an occasional sensation in my pelvis -- not really pain, it just felt like my hips or pelvis was spreading. Amanda said she'd felt the same thing so I didn't give it much thought.

Then last Tuesday I ran my normal trails in Rassie Wicker with Lauren R. and my lower back was killing me by the end of the run. For the rest of the night I literally could hardly walk -- I used both hands and the railing to make it up three stairs from the garage to the house. It was borderline excruciating to walk or even stand.

I got online and self-diagnosed it as a problem with my SI joint. Apparently, near the end of pregnancy your body releases a hormone to relax the pelvic area and prepare the joints for childbirth. Occasionally it releases too much and the ligaments get too loose and unstable.

Normally I would wait out this kind of thing but a) the pain was really, really bad and b) I am terrified of chronic back problems and c) everything thing I read said this problem could get worse with future pregnancies, of which I'm hoping for several and d) I will go insane if I can't run again soon. All in all it seemed like something I should try to nip in the bud.

After NINE DAYS of not running the pain is much better but I still can't really walk without limping. So this morning I had the first chiropractor visit of my life. He said it's definitely an SI joint issue but the good news is it should improve a lot with some specific exercises (that I have to go back next week to get -- paying another specialist co-pay, annoying).

He said I should take another week or two off from running while doing these exercises, but after that I should be able to run again (while continuing the exercises for several months). I'm sure it will be awesome running for the first time after two or three weeks off in mid-June at 36 weeks pregnant, but whatever -- I won't complain. I was sure he was going to tell me to just hold off on running until after Claire's born (which I would have ignored, but it's nice to have official approval). He also "adjusted" me and it felt great.

4. This afternoon we had the routine 34-week appointment. Starting with the next appointment (36 weeks) we'll go weekly. Everything looked fine, baby's heart rate was great, urine was clean, etc. I didn't see my regular doctor and this one told me to keep my heart rate below 140 when running, but it's a little too late to worry about that.

He also told me to try to gain a pound by the next visit because apparently I haven't gained weight in the past month, but I'm not sure if he was serious. I am an eating machine -- anyone who's spent time with me will attest to that -- and I don't know of any other way to gain weight (except to cut back on exercise ... hmm).

5. Here's today's bump!

Part 1: Nursery and mystery gift

2009-05-28T16:53:00.005-04:00

I guess I have some catching up to do, blog-wise. Here goes:

1. The nursery furniture is finally finished and for that we owe a HUUUUGE THANKS to Terry, aka Nana. She did all the dirty work -- priming, painting, glazing, staining when it turned out to be a much more ... vivid ... green than we had expected, and polying. On top of all that she intended to sneak back in with a drill and install the new handles, but we foiled her plan by coming home from the beach a day earlier than planned. I helped with the (three!) base coats and applying the glaze, but other than that, she did it all. Terry, thank you SO MUCH!

The awesomeness doesn't come through in the pictures. You should come see it for yourself.

Now all we have to do is organize all these piles of clothes and accessories (the girl has more shoes than I do) in the drawers. I'm hanging as much as I can but the closet is filling up fast. I didn't take a picture of that but I should have. It's a little shocking.
We had picked up the crib a week or two ago but it was just sitting in the box because we weren't inspired to put it together and there was no point anyway because we needed the floor space for painting the dresser and chest of drawers. Finally we got around to it Tuesday night, and can I just say thank goodness for a husband who can interpret instruction manuals with vague directions, not-that-helpful diagrams and extra screws.

We don't have a crib skirt yet, but we do have the matress and three fitted sheets -- $6.99-$9.99 at Target, nice! -- and I couldn't resist a trial run. My conclusion is that the total package is very cute. I love the way everything looks together.

2. When we got home from the beach we were really excited to find this package from abbyslane.com waiting for us! In retrospect I probably shouldn't have opened it until this weekend's shower, but I got ahead of myself. All of this is from my registry -- a BumGenius 3.0 one-size-fits-all cloth diaper, a super-cute Planet Wise wet bag for dirty/wet cloth diapers when we're on the go and a reusable wipe.

The only problem is I don't know who it's from so I don't know who to thank! I have a feeling a note or something was supposed to be included in the package, but it wasn't. If the generous gifter happens to read this blog, please identify yourself!
(Read Part 2 here.)

'An endless essay'

2009-05-14T13:17:00.005-04:00

From "Loud and Clear":

"What those books [on sibling rivalry and sleeping through the night and early childhood education] taught me, finally, and what the women on the playground taught me, and the well-meaning relations and the older parents at cocktail parties -- what they taught me was that they couldn't really teach me very much at all. Raising children is presented at first as a true-false test, then becomes multiple choice, until finally, far along, you realize that it is an endless essay. No one knows anything.

"One child responds well to positive reinforcement, another can only be managed with a stern voice and a time-out. One boy is toilet trained at 3, his brother at 2. When my first child was born, parents were told to put baby to bed on his belly so that he would not choke on his own spit-up. By the time my last arrived, babies were put down on their backs because of research on sudden infant death syndrome.

"As a new parent this ever-shifting certainty is terrifying, and then soothing. Eventually you must learn to trust yourself."

Thank you, Anna Quindlen.

Counting down

2009-05-13T13:40:00.006-04:00

Yesterday was the 32-week doctor's appointment and it was, as usual, uneventful. The most excitement came from the fact that we were going to eat at The Villager as soon as it was over. But boring is good when it comes to doctor's appointments.

Claire's heart rate has been in the upper-130s for the last couple of visits, down from the 150s several months ago, but apparently that's good because it's supposed to slow down as the pregnancy progresses. She's already positioned herself bottom-up, which is also good.

It was way early to be bringing this up, but I asked the doctor about the clinic's policy on inducing labor. He thought I was asking how early they would agree to induce me, and he told me 38 or 39 weeks if there were no red flags with the baby. But what I really wanted to know was how overdue I'd be allowed to get, because I'd much prefer to avoid an induction unless it's medically necessary, and he said I could go up to 42 weeks.

I hope and pray I don't go two weeks overdue (my amazing mom endured going THREE weeks overdue -- twice), but I'm glad it doesn't sound like they're going to rush things. I've heard horror stories of people having to fight not to be induced even just a few days after the due date. Which seems stupid since due dates are usually just an educated guess.

The heat of July could usher in a change of heart -- you never know -- but at least in that case it would be my decision, not something they're forcing.

Here's today's 32-week bump picture:In other news, Babies "R" Us called yesterday and said the crib came in, so we're going to pick it up tomorrow. Which means ... Remington Grill!

Short because I'm hungry

2009-05-08T10:35:00.005-04:00

I actually took a bump picture during week 30 but I just got around to posting it. For the sake of chronological accuracy, I added it to this post, if anyone's interested. The belly is getting BIG (compare it with the 28-week picture!) -- but so is the baby! She weighs about four pounds now, and is almost as long (tall?) as she'll be at birth. Which, by the way, will take place two months from today if she's right on time. Craziness.

I recently read two articles loosely related to the "free-range kids" concept that I love. One was in The Wall Street Journal -- Dad gets credit for finding and forwarding it -- and the other was in Newsweek. I'm not in the mood to editorialize right now; suffice it to say I wholeheartedly endorse the general perspective and parenting philosophy they reflect.

Coupons!

2009-04-28T14:59:00.010-04:00

Thanks to two batches of Babies "R" Us coupons -- one from Terry, one from the mail -- and a very lucky purchase at a consignment store, we made our first baby purchases this weekend.

At Babies "R" Us, we got the crib for a great price because the cashier accidentally gave us 15 percent off twice! We also bought the crib mattress (15 percent off) and the car seat (15 percent off). (Although in general we don't plan to buy much until after the showers are over, we thought it made sense to go ahead and use these coupons to buy the big-ticket items we're sure about since the coupons expire on Thursday.)

Someone had given us a car seat that we'd originally planned to use, but later we decided not to since it's already five years old, which is kind of pushing it, safety-wise. It might be fine for Claire, but we definitely wouldn't use it for future kids. Matt did his research and just Friday decided on this one: The next day we were driving by a local kids' consignment store, Doodlebugs, and saw the matching stroller sitting out front! We stopped and looked and it seemed to be in great shape. Best of all, it was about 40 percent less than it would have been new. It's considered a "full size" stroller, and we'd planned to get a slightly smaller one, but SpringFest with Lauren G. and her two kids last weekend already had me reconsidering.

Lauren's stroller has two separate handles, which makes it hard to steer if one hand is otherwise occupied, and it doesn't have a cup holder so she had to prop her drink in the under-the-seat basket. I'm definitely not buying a stroller based on its cup holder situation, but having one would be very handy since I believe in getting refills to-go. This stroller has a bar, not separate handles, and places for a drink and keys.

This just happens to be the same stroller/car seat combo that Carrie and Jacob have for Riley (but in green), and they gave it rave reviews. Yesterday Carrie went to Doodlebugs with Matt and me to make sure everything worked, and after getting the thumbs-up from her we bought it. We even got another 10 percent off for a stain that I think will come out (and if it doesn't, I'm sure it's just the first of many). Score!

We also ordered our glider this weekend, unfortunately not because of a coupon, but because its expected delivery date is six or eight weeks out, which is already cutting it close to the baby's due date (10 weeks from tomorrow). We thought about splurging on a really nice glider but decided not to. I'm sure it will get some good use, but we already have dozens of other places to sit and hold a baby -- it's not going to be the exclusive nursing spot or anything like that.

No more monthly appointments

2009-04-28T14:58:00.004-04:00

I feel like this blog's been a little neglected lately. Other than the fact of my rapidly expanding stomach, there's nothing much new to report. I've been feeling rather hugely pregnant for weeks now, but when I look back at pictures even from just two weeks ago, I realize I feel bigger than I look. The baby is now gaining weight at a rate of something like half a pound a week, so soon I will both feel AND look huge.
We had the 30-week appointment today, the last monthly appointment. From now until 36 weeks we'll go every two weeks, and from 36 weeks until the baby's born it will be every week. The doctor measured Claire at 30 centimeters long, which is right on target.

We had signed up for a childbirth class on May 16 but now I have a client coming into town that weekend, so we asked about rescheduling the class. The April one's already over and the June one is for something like June 28 -- a week and a half before our due date. The receptionist told us all of the information is available online, so armed with that website plus the packet of "curriculum" for the class (including yet another copy of "What to Expect the First Year" -- it's an epidemic!) I think we're going to skip the class altogether.

I'm so, so, so happy to report that I'm having consistently good runs again. My theory, actually, is that the pollen, not the pregnancy, was to blame. I've never been bothered by pollen, but one day last week I ran right after a good rain and had the best run in forever. That got me thinking pollen might be the culprit. The pollen's starting to build up again, so maybe this is partly mental, but I haven't had a bad run since then.

Also, this may have nothing to do with being pregnant, but I recently had the worst case of poison ivy I've ever had (it's finally clearing up after about two weeks). It started with two bumps on my ankle, which I scratched because I thought they were bug bites; it spread all the way up my body and over onto Matt's. It was terrible. Every day I found a new patch. Poison ivy, like pollen, has never affected me, so maybe the pregnancy somehow really is to blame.

28 weeks

2009-04-15T11:10:00.012-04:00

Happy seven-months-in-utero to Claire! It's amazing to me that, thanks to medical technology, she would have an excellent chance of surviving with no long-term ill effects if she were born now. Obviously a birth at 28 weeks is far from ideal, but it's nice to know that if it happened, it would probably be OK.

Judging from Claire's constant activity, I'd say she's having the time of her life in my stomach and isn't in any rush to exit. In another couple of months I'm sure she'll be a lot less comfortable (I know I will be). Pregnancy is treating me great, but I'm getting really excited about meeting the baby. I can't wait to hold her and start to learn her personality and see who she looks like.

I do have a minor complaint, which is that running has gotten more difficult in the past two weeks. I'm not sure if it's directly related to the pregnancy or if it's simply because I'm carrying around an extra 10 pounds, but I huff and puff all the way through my runs lately. I haven't had a really effortless run for a couple of weeks. When I get home and whine about it Matt says this is what running feels like for most people, so maybe I've just been spoiled for the past 20 years.

No matter how hard it is, I'm determined to run till the end -- no matter how pathetically slow I am around week 38 -- because it's absolutely essential to my sanity, and to me there's no substitute.

Good news

2009-04-09T18:42:00.001-04:00

I do not have gestational diabetes! I had the test this afternoon and got the call a few hours later as I was walking out of the grocery store carrying two pounds of strawberries, two pounds of plums and a 12-pack of Coke. I would hate to give up any of that sugary goodness, so I'm thrilled not to have to.

Also, here's the bump at 27 weeks:

3/3

2009-04-08T12:47:00.003-04:00

I think today (27 weeks) marks the beginning of my third trimester. In the past few weeks my stomach has grown from ambiguously pregnant to clearly pregnant. Last week on vacation I wore a bikini and wasn't self-conscious about it, but I was only around family. Stephen kept saying with astonishment "Your stomach is getting bigger every day!" My belly button, formerly an "innie," has flattened out and is flush with the rest of my stomach. I'll try to remember to get Matt to take a picture tonight.

Claire is a crazy active girl. Half the time I feel like a cyclone is blowing through my stomach (and often it looks like Mexican jumping beans are residing in there), but I love it. It's nice to know she's alive and well. Lately whenever we're watching TV and I'm bored, I just hike up my shirt, stare at my stomach and voila: instant entertainment.

Last night was a Subway/Chinese night and when I asked for extra pickles the woman nodded knowingly and said, "Because of the baby!" I laughed and told her my extra-pickles fetish is nothing new.

Tomorrow is my monthly doctor's appointment and it's the one where I'll be tested for gestational diabetes. I know it's highly unlikely that I'll test positive, but on the other hand, I eat sugar and drink Coke all day long, so why should I feel confident? Especially since both Melissa and Carrie had it. Well, what will be will be, I guess. Wish me luck.

Claire Devon

2009-03-23T11:34:00.002-04:00

We thought picking a middle name would be easy once we'd settled on Claire for the first name, but it wasn't. Anyway, we've finally decided just to go with Devon, for Claire Devon Kirby. We aren't crazy about the way the full name flows (it could use another couple of syllables), but overall we like it better than the other combinations we tossed around.

The main thing we like about Devon is that it's not at all common (ranked No. 793 for 2008) or girly. I don't think of Claire as a girly name either, but we found that when paired with most of the middle names we considered, it took on an overtly feminine quality that we didn't like.

Also, happy six-months-in-utero birthday to Claire (as of last Wednesday)! Here's the six-month/24-week picture, which we actually didn't get around to taking until last night, but it's close enough.

Reservoir randoms

2009-03-20T12:29:00.002-04:00

We've had a bunch of warm, sunny days in the past few weeks, and I've tried to take advantage of them by running at the reservoir. I almost inevitably see someone I know. Yesterday I passed a woman who's a casual business acquaintance going the opposite direction.

She said: Hey! ... HEY, I thought you were pregnant!

I thought: What a thing to say! What if I had been pregnant but something had gone terribly wrong? Should I spill all the sad details as we randomly cross paths on the trail?

But I said: I am!

She said: And you're RUNNING?!

I said: Why not?

By that point I was quite a bit past her and there was no prolonging the conversation unless I stopped running, which I didn't. I spent the next few minutes thinking about how crazy it was that she acted like I was crazy for running while pregnant. At every doctor's appointment I confirm with my doctor that it's still fine to keep working out, and all he has ever said is "Keep doing what you're doing" and "The more active you are now, the easier your pregnancy and labor will be."

As I got to the end of the loop I passed a couple of women who were walking. I detoured to the bathroom (because that is one thing about running while pregnant -- I have to pee every couple of miles) and when I came out I ran into them again.

One of them said: Can we ask you something? How old are you? We were trying to guess.

I said: 29.

The other one said: I guessed you were 17!

Ha! They obviously didn't get a good look (if nothing else, my wedding band and baby belly should have tipped them off), but it was good for a laugh anyway. I wonder if that will be the last time I'm ever taken for a teenager.

Anyway, there's no moral to these stories, I'm just blabbering.

Yay for eBay!

2009-03-10T14:00:00.007-04:00

Right after writing the last post a wonderful thing happened. I decided to check eBay one more time for the elusive 7 For All Mankind maternity jeans in my size and length and for a reasonable price, and miracle of miracles! A pair had just been listed in my size, with the original (34-inch) inseam, and for less than one-third what they cost in the store!

I was excited but didn't get my hopes up because there were several days of bidding left and I wasn't willing to pay the "buy it now" price. Yesterday, with just a few hours left in the auction, I finally put in a bid, still sure someone would swoop in at the last second and take them from me. But apparently most people in the market for these jeans really have shorter legs than I do because I WON!
I can't wait till they get here. I feel sure they'll fit because they're exactly what I've tried on in the store (and exactly what I wear in non-maternity jeans). But even if they don't, at this price, I'm confident I could resell them and break even, if not turn a profit -- although I might have to throw in a credit for hemming. :)

This afternoon we had our monthly doctor's appointment. It was completely routine -- all they did was check the heartbeat. And weigh me. Apparently I have now gained either seven or nine pounds (the scale flickered back and forth and I don't know which number the nurse went with), almost all of which came in the last month. Clearly I have a healthy appetite.

Yesterday was the first time a stranger commented on my belly, and it happened not once but twice, in Chick-fil-A and then at the new shoe store beside the new TJ Maxx. Amanda was with me both times. The woman at the shoe store also felt the need to inform Amanda she is in fact going to have a boy. Multiple ultrasounds? Whatever. She's carrying it like a boy. (No worries, she agreed that I'm having a girl.)

What to wear

2009-03-05T16:12:00.000-05:00

Week 22 already! That's so hard to believe. This is my stomach as of last night:
People who know I'm pregnant keep saying it's really popping out, but I still feel like strangers might look at me and see a beer belly.

Last week I decided, with Matt's input, that rather than buying one pair of super-expensive 7 For All Mankind maternity jeans, I'd buy:

a) one pair of cheap jeans (these are from Motherhood Maternity and with a 31-inch inseam they're just long enough to wear with flats; hopefully they won't shrink AT ALL in the wash, but if they do, they'll make their way to Amanda's closet like countless other pants);

b) one pair of long dressy jeans (these are from GapMaternity and I LOVE THEM. They are long enough to wear with heels or wedges and I can dress them up or down);
c) one pair of casual, lightweight pants that will be good with a T-shirt and flip-flops -- as comfortable as sweatpants, but cuter (I haven't bought any yet, but these are from GapMaternity);
d) and one pair of black dress pants (so far I haven't found a single pair that fits right -- they're all short and baggy).

All of these will add up to less than one pair of designer jeans (crazy) and I think I'll be happier with several options rather than just one perfect pair. I might be wrong about that, but I can say for sure that I LOVE the long Gap dressy jeans (which I'm wearing today). While I don't love the way these "everyday" jeans look on me, they're good enough ... I think.

Loving the band

2009-02-23T18:06:00.004-05:00

My stomach continues to grow and I'm going to assume that Claire's to blame, not Girl Scout cookies. (WHY does no cookie manufacturer copy and sell Samoas?!)

Yesterday I wore work pants to church, as usual, and they were uncomfortably tight. I couldn't wait to get home and trade them out for pajama pants. So today I used the belly band with my work pants for the first time. Love it! It's not "the" Bella Band, just a generic I found on eBay, but it works great. In fact, I think everyone -- man or woman, pregnant or not -- should own a belly band for fat days.

I don't know how long it will let me postpone real maternity pants. Carrie didn't like the band, but Amanda used it for months, and they're about the same size (before and during pregnancy) so maybe it's just personal preference.

Speaking of maternity pants, last week we were in Atlanta and our hotel was one mile from A Pea in the Pod, so I decided to bite the bullet and buy the 7 for All Mankind maternity jeans I've been lusting after. I'd seen on their website that the style I wanted was $25 off and I'd called the 800-number to ask if that discount applied in stores as well as online (I was told it did) and how long it was good for (I was told through the end of February).

So Matt and I went to the store, they had one pair in my size, I tried them on, I loved them. Just to make sure, I asked the saleswoman, "These are $25 off, right?" And what did she say? "That sale ended yesterday!" NO! Now I can't buy them for full price, on principle.

I'm going to write a letter to A Pea in the Pod, explain the situation and ask if they'll send me a $25 coupon, but I'm sure they won't. I wish I'd never even known about that short-lived sale. I also wish I'd emailed A Pea in the Pod about how long the sale was going on, rather than just calling -- now it's my word against theirs.

There are a zillion pairs of 7 maternity jeans on eBay, but I'm very hesitant to buy them without trying them on because so many of them have been altered. I don't buy 7s for the label, I buy them for the length -- so I don't want to shell out a lot of money for a pair of jeans that started out with a 34-inch inseam and are now down to 31. If I'm going to wear maternity jeans that aren't quite long enough, I can just get them at Target. Plus, if I buy them off of eBay and they don't work, I'm stuck with them -- I can't just return them to the store -- and I do NOT want to have to deal with reselling them.

Back to my expanding stomach, today was the first day at CrossFit that my stomach definitely hit the ground while I was doing pushups. It was weird -- it felt like there was a ball under me. I didn't like it. I'm also quitting ab workouts as of today because I'm afraid of building ab muscles around the bump.

Can you believe we're more than halfway through this pregnancy? Or only halfway through -- I can't decide which.

P.S. We still haven't decided on a middle name ...

Claire

2009-02-16T15:54:00.011-05:00

First things first. I think we've settled on Claire as the baby's first name. The middle name is still up in the air but I promise we'll decide before she's born (and probably a lot sooner, like by next week). But it would be OK if you wanted to start getting attached to the idea of an adorable new human named Claire Kirby.

We like Claire because (in our opinion) it's pretty and classic -- I can imagine a grandmother named Claire just as easily as a baby Claire. It's feminine but not girly, simple but not plain. And as the 66th-most-common name of 2008, it's a level of popularity that we like: not weird or unusual -- everyone will recognize it and spell it right -- but she also won't be one of four Claires in her kindergarten class.

Not that Matt (No. 6 for 1978) and I (No. 1 for 1979) have any lingering resentments about that. :)

Saturday we ventured to Babys 'R' Us for the first time and it was, in a word, overwhelming. The average baby probably actually needs less than 10 percent of what is sold in there, but whatever. We didn't plan to buy anything on that trip, we just wanted to start getting an idea of what's out there for the few big-ticketish items we probably are going to buy before she's born: crib, "play yard" (Pack 'n' Play), stroller and glider/rocking chair/recliner.

I think this is the crib we're going to get: It doesn't convert to a toddler bed, which is the current rage, but that's actually our preference because we hope to have a few more kids in fairly quick succession and therefore will probably just keep a nursery set up in our house for the next decade. The kids can all use the same crib and other nursery furniture and after outgrowing the crib they'll probably go straight to a full-size bed.

We were thrilled when Terry told us this weekend that Matt's baby furniture was still around somewhere, and yesterday we found and claimed it. The dresser was in Stephen's guest room and the chest of drawers was in his old room at Ron's house. We brought both of them home and I'm going to beg Terry to help me faux-finish them for the nursery. I want something gender-neutral, maybe a good green. One of these pieces will double as the changing table with a changing table topper similar to this:

OK, that is all ... for now.

Ultrasound pictures

2009-02-12T14:43:00.007-05:00

I can't decipher much from them, but here are Tuesday's ultrasound pictures. She wiggled around a lot but didn't do anything awesome like give us a thumbs-up, like Brianna did. :)

We thought we'd be ready to announce the name by now but we aren't quite there. It's such a big decision -- so permanent! And so many things to consider. Will her monogram spell out something vulgar? Is there a famous murderer with this name? Does it suit a teenager, business woman, mom, grandmother as well as it suits a cute baby? Will people constantly misspell it? Aaaah!

We're probably 90 percent decided and hope to make a final decision in a few days so we (and you) can start referring to her by name. Although for now I'm happy just to be able to call her "her" instead of "it."

It's a girl!

2009-02-10T16:20:00.003-05:00

Click here for details ...

Visible bump

2009-02-04T18:05:00.007-05:00

Finally, finally, I have a bump that shows up in pictures! I can still wear all of my pants but most of my work pants are starting to get tight. I can probably squeeze another couple of weeks out of them. My jeans are still fine since they sit lower than my work pants.

Check out the growth.

This was taken at 4 weeks, right after I found out I was pregnant:

I took pictures at 8 weeks, 12 weeks, 16 weeks ... still no change ... then this one at 17 weeks (I thought the bump would show up in last week's pictures, since there was no mistaking it in real life, but it didn't):

Then, today's 18-week photo. Can you believe the difference a week made?Time to get diligent about the stretch-mark-prevention cream. I wish I believed in that stuff but I think it's more about genetics (but I'll use it anyway).

P.S. Have you ever seen such a disgusting-looking sweet potato?

Making him/herself known

2009-02-03T22:00:00.003-05:00

I've started feeling the baby move a lot more and it's feeling less like bubbles than like definite movements (I can't feel kicking yet). I have noticed I almost always feel the movements only on my left side -- can any of you more experienced moms or pregnant people tell me if that's normal?

Both times that the doctor listened to the baby's heartbeat it (the heartbeat) was on my right side, so maybe it's just that the baby's legs are on the left side and I'm feeling them kick. I guess that could be the explanation but I pictured the baby moving around a lot more than that, not staying in essentially the same position all this time.

Last night, or actually this morning, around 5 I woke up flat on my back and felt something poking out of the left side of my stomach. It was definitely solid and it felt like an elbow but I'm guessing it was a foot. It felt like you could have seen it poking out, but since the room was dark I don't know. I lay there for a while rubbing it, trying to get it to move so I'd know for sure it was the baby and not a tumor or something, but it just stayed there until I got up to use the bathroom.

When I got back in bed it was gone and I fell back asleep. Although I sometimes have very lifelike dreams and occasionally have even confused them with reality, I am about 95 percent sure this really happened. And Amanda assured me this morning that it was possible to feel that this early.

And speaking of dreams, I had a VERY vivid dream last night that the baby is a boy. For the record, I still think it's a girl -- but I know it's 50/50 and don't really put any stock in gut feelings (or dreams) about things like this.

Pro-dirt

2009-01-27T18:14:00.006-05:00

I've always suspected I'll be the kind of mom who isn't anal (enough?) about my kids' cleanliness. I don't mean I'm going to let them be filthy. But I also won't flip out if a dropped pacifier finds its way back to their mouth before it's cleaned. Of course I'll teach them to do things like wash their hands before eating, but honestly, mostly just so other people don't think I'm a terrible mother.

I have a long-held belief that it's good for kids to be exposed to a certain amount of germs. I could be wrong, but I believe that one reason Amanda and I don't have a single allergy is that we grew up in a 100-year-old house that was, to say the least, not tightly sealed. I think that being outdoors and getting dirty is not only the most fun kids can have but that it's good for their health.

This is just my personal opinion. I'm not criticizing all the moms, which is most of them, who are way more sanitarily conscious (?) than I am; and I can't swear I won't adjust my attitude once I have kids that actually play in the dirt and then resist washing their hands before dinner.

(For the record, when keeping other people's children I do respect the fact that their mothers care more about these things than I do. Although occasionally I forget and get called out. Like the time I was keeping church nursery and fed a kid a Cheerio she'd dropped. Another little girl saw me and yelled, "You never, ever, ever, ever, EVER eat food off the floor!" Oops.)

But I was happy to read this article: "Babies Know: A Little Dirt Is Good For You." The whole article's interesting, but here's a summary:

"What a child is doing when he puts things in his mouth is allowing his immune response to explore his environment," Mary Ruebush, a microbiology and immunology instructor, wrote in her new book, "Why Dirt Is Good" (Kaplan). "Not only does this allow for 'practice' of immune responses, which will be necessary for protection, but it also plays a critical role in teaching the immature immune response what is best ignored."

One leading researcher, Dr. Joel V. Weinstock, the director of gastroenterology and hepatology at Tufts Medical Center in Boston, said in an interview that the immune system at birth "is like an unprogrammed computer. It needs instruction." He said that public health measures like cleaning up contaminated water and food have saved the lives of countless children, but they "also eliminated exposure to many organisms that are probably good for us."

"Children raised in an ultraclean environment," he added, "are not being exposed to organisms that help them develop appropriate immune regulatory circuits."

Dr. Ruebush ... does not suggest a return to filth. ... But she deplores the current fetish for the hundreds of antibacterial products that convey a false sense of security and may actually foster the development of antibiotic-resistant, disease-causing bacteria. ... '"I certainly recommend washing your hands after using the bathroom, before eating, after changing a diaper, before and after handling food," and whenever they're visibly soiled, she wrote.

Dr. Weinstock goes even further. "Children should be allowed to go barefoot in the dirt, play in the dirt, and not have to wash their hands when they come in to eat," he said.

Hormones

2009-01-26T14:20:00.006-05:00

I don't feel hormonal, but something's off because I have cried over some crazy things lately. Such as a TV remote that wouldn't work for me and then immediately worked for Matt. And a Sports Guy column about a dog that died. And Kay Yow's death (very sad, but it's not like I knew her personally). And the taste of Coke (happy tears). Matt could give you more examples.

It's like irrational PMS tears except that in this case I know as I'm crying that I'm reacting disproportionately, and usually that makes me laugh through the tears. Whereas with PMS outbreaks it was usually the next day before I realized how unreasonable I was being.

In other news, my bump is starting to show (I've been saying that for weeks, but finally other people are acknowledging it). I even got my first belly pat last week, courtesy of Lauren R. My clothes still fit fine and I haven't gained any weight -- yet -- but I looked back at Amanda's pictures and she started to pop between 16 and 20 weeks so I bet I'll be the same.

I hesitate to talk about "cravings" while pregnant because I don't think I've been craving anything more now than I did before I was pregnant. I mean, hearing me say "We need to make a chocolate cake RIGHT NOW" is not something Matt experienced for the first time in the past 17 weeks.

But in the past month or so especially there have been certain foods that sound good to me all the time: grilled cheese sandwiches, peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, cheese toast, Kraft macaroni and cheese, peanut butter and crackers, pizza, oatmeal, Chick-fil-A, cereal, yogurt, grapefruit juice and FRUIT. All fruit, but especially strawberries, white grapes, blueberries and oranges ... I cannot get enough.

All of those foods, with the exception of pizza, are pretty bland. Heavily seasoned foods, even those that I love -- chili, steaks, lasagna, Japanese food -- are totally unappealing to me right now. This seems like something that would have hit in the first trimester; I don't know what's causing it. It's not that foods with strong flavors make me feel queasy, not at all; they just, as I said, don't sound good.

Matt thought I was crazy until Carrie told him she went through a pregnancy phase of wanting nothing but grilled cheese and PB&J sandwiches. I suppose it will pass. I'm fine with it, but it does make me completely unmotivated to cook, so I feel bad for Matt.

No news is good news

2009-01-15T11:26:00.006-05:00

We had a good, uneventful doctor's appointment on Tuesday. I didn't even get undressed -- I'm not sure what the point of the visit was -- but we did get to hear the heartbeat again (155 beats per minute). The best thing about that appointment was that we got to schedule our NEXT one -- Feb. 10 -- when we'll find out the sex of the baby! I still think it's a girl ... Matt thinks it's a boy ... we'll be happy either way.

Soon after that visit we'll be announcing the baby's name, so stay tuned. And although we aren't disclosing the names we're thinking about, this is your last call if there are ones you feel we must consider. Don't get your hopes up, though -- I think we're pretty set. :)

I asked the doctor if it would be OK to sign up for the Nashville half-marathon in April, and he said it was fine as long as I was in shape for it and stayed hydrated during it. Carrie and Jacob have signed up for it, Stephen was going to if I did and Matt would have joined us for the trip. I don't love half-marathons, but it's supposed to be a really fun race, with a band every mile and great crowd support. Plus there's something about being pregnant, especially visibly so (which I assume I will be by then), that takes off ALL pressure to run fast.

But I was thinking the race was on April 29, which is only nine days after Amanda's due date, and I know first babies sometimes tend to come late. I definitely don't want to be in Nashville during Brianna's birth, nor do I want to lose a not-cheap race registration fee if that's how the timing works out. And then yesterday Carrie told me the race is actually on April 25 -- even closer to Amanda's due date, and more of a potential conflict -- so I think I've decided to skip the race. It would have been a fun road trip/long weekend, but not as much fun as holding my newest niece!

I feel kind of stupid putting this out there because I'm not sure it's even possible yet, and I don't like thinking of myself as a crazy pregnant woman with an overactive imagination ... but I wonder if I've been feeling the baby move for a few days. It hasn't happened often, but I've noticed a kind of fluttery or bubbly feeling while lying in bed a few times. I have read online of people feeling this sensation around 14-16 weeks, but it seems much more common in another month or so.

For Kate

2009-01-08T13:43:00.005-05:00

I haven't posted in awhile but I have a good excuse -- nothing seems to be going on pregnancy-wise! Which isn't really true, the baby has grown from a plum to a peach to a lemon since the last time I wrote, and formed teeth, approached normal proportions (its head is only a third of the size of its body now), and started sucking its thumb and breathing amniotic fluid. Amazing!

I feel and look as utterly unpregnant as ever. You know those birth-control pills that let you have only four periods a year? I always thought those were a terrible idea because if you did accidentally get pregnant, you might not know for a couple of months. When you're doing your best to not be pregnant a monthly period is wonderfully reassuring.

Now that I'm three and a half months pregnant I feel more strongly than ever that I could never be comfortable with that particular pill. I am (was) religious about taking birth control exactly as prescribed, at exactly the same time every day, etc., and therefore I always had perfect confidence that I was protected. And while I could recognize certain pregnancy symptoms (tiredness, sensitivity to smells) once I knew I was pregnant, they surely wouldn't have been strong enough to make me suspect pregnancy if I were trying to avoid it. Can you imagine blithely carrying on with your life, only to discover one day that you were a third of the way through a pregnancy? No thank you.

For a few days about a week ago I had a string of mild to terrible headaches and I was worried they were related to the pregnancy, coming as the did around the beginning of the second trimester. Thankfully, they have been gone for four straight days now and I think they must have had another cause: either not eating enough, not drinking enough water, getting too much sleep over the holidays, or being off my regular workout routine (only working out about three times over two weeks).

I had welcomed Cokes back into my life around Christmas but I don't think the added caffeine was directly contributing to the headaches -- but I do think that every bottle of Coke I drank probably represented a bottle of water I didn't drink. And that probably left me a little dehydrated, which is bad news for headaches. This week I've gone back to water, juice and tea, plus am back to my regular sleep and workout routines and am trying to eat more every day, and it seems to be working.

That's all I've got for now. We go back to the doctor on Tuesday, I think just to hear the heartbeat again, so maybe I'll have more to report then, if not before.

Milestones

2008-12-23T15:35:00.006-05:00

The baby's reportedly growing by leaps and bounds these days, but there's no outward evidence, which is why I haven't blogged lately. Week 12 (plum) starts tomorrow so that's a good milestone -- the end of the first trimester. I think. I've heard conflicting things about that -- some say the first trimester is 14 weeks long. Whatever, it doesn't really matter.

The other baby news from this week is that I've started to notice the tiniest of baby bumps. No one else would be able to tell it's there -- even Matt can't see it when I try to show him -- but I can. No matter how I suck in, there's a bump below my belly button that won't go away.

I know it's just bloating, and my pants still fit perfectly fine, but I decided to be proactive and order a set of three belly bands (not the brand-name Bella Bands) off of eBay. These allow you to keep wearing your regular pants, just unzipped and unbuttoned. I don't know how long they'll work, but Amanda's almost three months ahead of me and they're still doing the trick for her.

In the past couple of weeks I've gotten less strict about caffeine and in fact have begun having sweet tea with lunch almost every day. Just today I had my first cherry Coke, but only because I think I'm permanently sick of Sprite, and that was the only caffeine-free option (except for water, but I'd paid for the combo). Although tea has its share of sugar and caffeine, it feels a lot healthier than soda, and I don't feel guilty having a glass or two once a day.

Oh, this was cool too -- a girl at CrossFit who I barely even know gave me a like-new infant car seat/carrier yesterday. It's gender-neutral and looks like it's never been used. I thought that was so nice!

The lime has a heartbeat!

2008-12-16T15:21:00.005-05:00

Technically the baby won't be the size of a lime until tomorrow, but I'm so opposed to prunes (this week's fruit) that I'm going to promote it a day early.

We had another doctor's appointment today and got to hear the heartbeat! Hooray! That was so exciting!

I think I'll really be able to relax now. I'd been a little nervous the past couple of weeks because my only two symptoms (exhaustion and slight breast tenderness) had pretty much disappeared. But the doctor said everything looks great, the heartbeat is at 176 (he said it probably will be a little slower at my next appointment) and I can consider myself very lucky to be feeling so good.

Other than hearing the heartbeat, the only purpose of the visit was for him to do a general exam and pap smear because I hadn't had one since last August. At my next appointment, Jan. 13, I think he's just going to listen for the heartbeat again -- and at the NEXT one we'll get the all-important boy-or-girl ultrasound!

I asked the doctor about workout limits or precautions as the second trimester approaches and he repeated what he said at the last visit -- just to listen to my body and keep doing what I've been doing unless it gets uncomfortable. He said the only potential harm would be if I somehow got hit in the stomach, but there's not much chance of that. I love how relaxed he is about everything. For now my plan is to do CrossFit (modified if necessary) through the second trimester, then probably just run in the third trimester.

I also asked him if I need to be careful about lying on my back, as some people have told me, and he said not to really worry about it. He said if you did sleep eight straight hours on your back that wouldn't be ideal, but most people move around in their sleep all night long, so it's not a concern. And seriously, I wake up to pee like two or three times a night now, so there's no danger of me sleeping eight straight hours in any position.

Workout tweaks

2008-12-12T13:57:00.005-05:00

With just a couple of weeks left in my first trimester I'm starting to research if and how I need to adjust my workouts, particularly CrossFit, for the remainder of the pregnancy. Of course the main priority is to not inadvertently harm the baby -- that's a given -- but I want to know how hard it's OK to push myself in the coming months.

CrossFit is definitely intense, but by the time I found out I was pregnant my body was already well-adjusted to doing it several times a week, plus running two or three times a week. I wrote earlier that my doctor told me it was fine to keep doing what I've been doing, but I know I'll have to tweak some things as the baby and my stomach grow.

I should probably stop doing crunches sometime soon, for example. I think you're supposed to stay off your back in the second and third trimesters. And I know you're not supposed to lift a lot of weights, but I already skip the CrossFit days (Tuesday and Thursday) that focus on weightlifting, just because I don't want to build bulk and don't care about increasing my maxes. Also, eventually I might need to modify the workouts that involve jumping -- do step-ups instead of tire jumps, etc.

Carrie's doctor told her to stop doing ab workouts pretty early on in her pregnancy -- around week 12, I think. Not only for the baby's health but because Carrie's ab muscles would be distorted if they kept growing while the baby bump grew. Carrie, I need you to refresh me on all that.

I want to keep doing as much as I can, and just to be clear, my weight isn't the issue. I'm definitely not trying to be a psycho workout pregnant girl, and I have no problem gaining however much weight my body needs to. I just want to stay as healthy as possible. Exercise is good for me and for the baby, and working out gives me more energy every day.

I keep coming across references to this site, but I don't think it says much that isn't common sense. I have a doctor's appointment on Tuesday and I'm going to talk to him about all this, but CrossFit is pretty obscure so I don't know how helpful he'll be.

Let's hear it for the boy

2008-12-09T11:09:00.008-05:00

One of the best things about being married to a guy with the mind of an engineer and an obsession with Consumer Reports is this: He has agreed to take charge of all the baby-product research and purchase decisions. There's an overwhelming amount of information and advertising out there and I'm just happy he's willing to wade through it. What a man.

Also, good news: The doctor just called and said my "prenatal panel" came back completely normal. I'm still not sure what all was tested, but normal is good.

The secret's out, mostly

2008-12-04T10:08:00.009-05:00

Apparently I'm not so great about blogging when I know I don't have an audience! Or it may be that there just isn't much to say about being pregnant right now. In the last week or so we've told a bunch of our friends and family, and as of today we're telling those who already know that it's fine to spread the word. Such good secret-keepers our friends and family have proved to be -- for the most part! I'm also planning to post it on my "real" blog and on Facebook today. You know, nothing's official until it hits Facebook.

There's a lot going on with the baby -- he or she is the size of a green olive right now -- but I still can't tell much. My tiredness seems a little better, which actually makes me a little nervous since it's my only indisputable pregnancy symptom. I've also noticed in the past week or so a tendency toward queasiness when I'm really hungry, especially at night. It's not nausea -- I never feel like I'm going to throw up -- it's more like my blood sugar's way off. It goes away as soon as I eat so I'm just learning to not postpone dinner (or to eat a snack if I have to wait on Matt).

I had another doctor's appointment on Monday, but it was uneventful. I didn't see the doctor, have an ultrasound or even get weighed, which made me happy, the appointment coming as it did on the heels of Thanksgiving. The entire point of the visit was to gather my medical history and take blood for a basic prenatal workup -- I'm not sure what that tests for. I also got a flu shot, which I wasn't sure about -- I usually don't get one -- but the nurse promised that there's no potential harm to the baby, that I wouldn't get the flu from it and that I do not want to be pregnant with the flu (as she was). So I got the shot.

The best thing to come from the appointment was a boatload of free prenatal vitamins. The ones my doctor prescribed had no generic and were pricey -- like $45 for a 30-day supply. I asked the nurse for something comparable with a generic, but she said the one I was using was really the best because it has DHA (?) which I guess is very important for the baby but not all prenatals have. But then she gave me a 50-day supply of samples of the good stuff! So that'll do me for awhile.

My next appointment is on the 16th and I'll get to see the doctor but not have another ultrasound. I think we might get to hear the heartbeat, but it might be a little early -- I've heard you can definitely hear it by week 12. I actually don't think I get another ultrasound until the one where we find out the sex, unless a problem arises. But as long as we can hear the heartbeat I'm OK with waiting on the ultrasound.

Called out

2008-11-23T07:48:00.011-05:00

I was worried it was inevitable, and it happened last night: I got called out for not drinking and subsequently "discovered" as pregnant. We were at a birthday party for our friend Wendi. While we knew everyone there, most of them are casual acquaintances, not good friends. A lot of them go to the same gym as us but they're definitely a crowd we would have expected to tell about the baby in, say, another month. Not how it went down.

First of all, before we'd even arrived Wendi had opened a bottle of white wine just for me. Apparently everyone else there prefers red wine, beer or bloody Marys, so the white just sat there opened and full. She kept trying to force it on me and I kept trying to put her off without being obvious. I'd run a 10k race that morning and was trying to play the "I'm dehydrated/just need water for now" card. I could tell she wasn't quite buying it, but there was a lot going on and she didn't pursue it.

Then this guy Thomas, whom we don't know well at all, came up to me.

Thomas: Why aren't you drinking tonight?
Me: I don't know, I just don't feel like it. I need water tonight. I don't really drink much anyway.
Thomas: Uh-huh. Or is there something you're waiting to tell us?
Me: No ...
Thomas: A little CrossFit baby on the way?

I am the world's worst liar, so I just shook my head and walked away but apparently that was not a good cover because he grabbed my arm and said "Aha!"

Luckily right after that we started playing Pictionary, boys versus girls, so I was safe with the girls where he couldn't pursue his questioning. But a few hours later, when we were leaving, he shook Matt's hand.

Thomas (stage whisper): Congratulations, man. I won't say a word!
Wendi (overhearing, because that was really loud): What's he congratulating you for?
Thomas: Oh ... they just ... had a really good workout yesterday, that's all.
Wendi: You're pregnant, aren't you.

Thanks, Captain Obvious.

So we're definitely telling our grandparents this week. I just don't want them to hear it from anyone else, and too many people know now. Not that any of them probably know our grandparents. But word travels like wildfire in this town.

Pink, I think

2008-11-21T13:29:00.007-05:00

I am going to go on record as saying I'm positive we're having a girl. Obviously there's no way to know that for sure for a few more months, but whenever I think about this baby, I can only think of it as a girl. In my thoughts and prayers I always refer to her(?) as "her" or "she" -- sometimes this even slips out when I'm talking to Matt. It's been like this ever since I found out I was pregnant.

This could be because I grew up with only a sister and suspect I'd have no idea what to do with a boy. It could be because I'm hoping to get to buy cute girly stuff. It could be because I'm greedy for hand-me-downs (virtually all of our friends with a baby have had a girl).

For what it's worth, Mom and Dad agree. Mom said that when I told them, both of them almost immediately thought, She's going to have a girl. Of course all of this could mean nothing -- I certainly wouldn't be the first person to be dead wrong about the gender. Luckily, Matt (who's leaning toward a boy) and I will have plenty of time to get used to the idea between the 20-week ultrasound and the birth.

Slippery slope

2008-11-20T11:45:00.004-05:00

There's a weird thing happening here that I don't know how to avoid, and that is that I've had to announce my pregnancy to some people who barely qualify as acquaintances, yet most of our friends and even our grandparents don't have a clue yet.

For example: The day it finally sank in that I was pregnant (around day 4 of at-home positives) I had an appointment for a cavity filling that afternoon. I knew they'd be numbing my mouth and I wasn't sure whether that was OK for the baby. I googled it and got with mixed responses, but several sites said it's better to wait until the second trimester for fillings, so I decided to play it safe.

I called to reschedule my appointment. Unfortunately, in order to not be charged for the missed appointment (I didn't give 24 hours' notice) I had to have a really good explanation. I told the receptionist that I had found out just that morning that I was pregnant and that in fact she was the third person on the planet to know. Which is odd. Then I begged her not to say anything to anyone -- all of Matt's family goes to the same dentist.

It happened again today. I was supposed to play on a tennis league next spring and practices are starting now and I guess I could have waited but I felt like I should tell the coach so she'd have enough time to replace me -- she's already short two players.

This doesn't even count all the acquaintances who work at my doctor's office -- but hopefully HIPAA laws are a strong enough incentive for them to keep quiet.

What not to eat

2008-11-20T11:12:00.003-05:00

I've known some friends and acquaintances to go seemingly overboard in their caution while pregnant. Most doctors will tell you that most everything's fine in moderation, but some people aren't willing to do ANYTHING that could possibly harm the baby. I know of people who have switched face washes to avoid salicylic acid, who have replaced all of their cleaning products with more natural ones, who have refused to drink tap water, who won't eat a Caesar salad, etc.

I'm certainly not judging anyone for taking the conservative approach and it's true you can find articles online making a case for cutting out salicylic acid, cleaning chemicals, tap water and anything made with raw or undercooked egg. Plus a whole lot more.

Personally, I'm comfortable avoiding the major risks and approaching everything else with moderation.

I'm strictly cutting out alcohol for the entire pregnancy, and most caffeine at least for the first trimester (I've had a glass of sweet tea here and there). Most studies agree that some caffeine is safe and too much caffeine can increase the risk of miscarriage. It's actually easier for me to go cold-turkey on caffeine than to drink just a little. ("Abstinence is as easy to me as temperance would be difficult," Samuel Johnson said.) And there are plenty of good options when I just need the buzz of carbonation -- root beer, ginger ale, decaf Coke, etc.

Other foods you're supposed to limit or avoid are hot dogs, pepperoni and bacon, none of which I'm being strict about. I haven't had a hot dog so far but if I crave one I will. You're supposed to be vigilant about cleaning fruits before you eat them and I'm going to try to get better about that. I have cut out turkey sandwiches (they're OK if the turkey's heated, but I don't like it heated) and luckily I don't like sushi and I also won't eat soft cheeses.

Slight symptoms

2008-11-20T10:55:00.002-05:00

The other day I wrote that I haven't experienced any pregnancy symptoms at all, other than tiredness. But as I thought about that later I realized it's not quite true.

Before I even knew I was pregnant, as early as a week after conception, I noticed smells everywhere I went. Not in a bad way or a good way -- they were just much more noticeable than usual. I'd walk into a room and the first thing I'd think was, It smells like [whatever] in here. That lasted only a week or so for me.

Yesterday Carrie gave me one of her pregnancy books, appropriately titled "I'm Pregnant!," and it said a heightened sense of smell is commonly the first sign of pregnancy. For most people, I think it stays strong and is accompanied by food aversions, cravings and morning sickness. But for me it just died down.

Also, Matt informed me yesterday that I've been snapping at him a lot lately. I have to admit this surprised me because I haven't been aware of being irritable in general and definitely not around him. And I've been on the lookout for it, especially since Amanda, who's 18 weeks pregnant, has been irritable for much of her pregnancy. I wonder if I'm snapping at anyone else without realizing it. I may have to issue a blanket apology when we go public with the baby news.

Finally, my boobs are a little tender. Nothing like every other pregnant woman's seem to be -- they definitely couldn't be described as painful. They're not even as sore as they usually are during PMS. But the extra tenderness has been there constantly for, oh, about a month now.

Tiny town

2008-11-18T15:59:00.006-05:00

It's so hard to keep a secret in this town. When I went to the doctor for my initial blood test to confirm pregnancy, who did I run into but my grandparents! I couldn't believe it. I just told them I was there for some bloodwork, and they didn't know we were in baby-making mode so they weren't suspicious. So not suspicious that my grandmother thought nothing of mentioning that she'd seen me there to everyone at Sunday lunch the next week (I wasn't there).

My mom had randomly announced to me a couple of weeks earlier -- on the very day of conception, it turned out -- that she had a feeling I was pregnant. Even after I found out I was, Matt and I didn't plan to tell ANYONE except Amanda (I had to tell her!), until at least eight weeks or so. But after this Sunday-lunch announcement, my mom pulled Amanda aside and asked her point-blank if she knew of any reason why I'd be getting bloodwork. Amanda tried to play it cool but immediately called me to give me a heads-up that Mom was suspicious.

That's when Matt and I decided just to tell a few people -- our parents, his brothers and Carrie, and a handful of our very closest friends. We still haven't even told our grandparents. :) By Thanksgiving we're going to be less careful about it and by Christmas everyone will know.

Back to the tiny town for a second -- my experience was not nearly as bad as Carrie's. I went with her to the doctor for the blood test to confirm her pregnancy and as we were checking out we ran into our mother-in-law. Carrie was holding a huge bag of samples of prenatal vitamins and booklets. Our mother-in-law saw us and waved and we turned around and bolted. Needless to say, she figured out pretty fast that one of us was with child and Carrie and Jacob had announced it to the family within a week.

Bedside manner: negative

2008-11-18T15:40:00.004-05:00

We went for our first ultrasound last Thursday at five weeks, six days and I was excited that we might get to see the heartbeat because once the heartbeat's been detected the chance of miscarriage drops to less than 10 percent. But I was trying not to be too excited because the heartbeat can't always be seen that early -- a few days can make a big difference around six weeks. Still, I hoped.

So we went in and the ultrasound started and after a few seconds the ultrasound tech asks me "Have you HAD a positive pregnancy test?" HUH? My heart dropped and I said "Yes" and she kept moving the wand around and didn't say another word for what felt like forever but must have really been five or 10 minutes. I couldn't see the screen so I didn't have any idea what was going on but I felt sure she'd tell me when she found the baby. I was freaking out in my mind and praying really, really hard for her to find the baby and for it to be fine.

I could only think of three possibilities: a) I'd had a miscarriage, which I didn't think was likely because I hadn't had bleeding or cramps or any other symptoms; b) I hadn't been pregnant in the first place, which I didn't think was likely because I'd had five positive home pregnancy tests and a positive blood test at the doctor's office; c) the baby wasn't where it was supposed to be, which I figured couldn't be good (ectopic?). She just kept moving the wand around and not saying a word.

Finally, she moved the screen so I could see it and pointed out the baby and its heartbeat (yay!) and said it was measuring right on schedule. I told her, "Your silence was scaring me!" but I was so relieved my annoyance quickly disappeared.

She left so I could get dressed and Matt and I agreed that was terrifying. He had been able to see the screen from where he sat so although it did take her a couple of minutes to find the baby, he saw her find it. But HE DIDN'T SAY ANYTHING. So for several minutes, while she was measuring the baby, etc., I was the only person in the room who thought she was still looking in vain for the baby.

I asked Matt, "WHY didn't you say something when she found it?!" and did not get a satisfactory response. Oh well. All's well that ends well.
(He thinks this picture looks like a creepy rabbit. I can see it too.)

Sleepy me

2008-11-18T15:14:00.004-05:00

So far the weirdest thing about being pregnant is that I don't feel different AT ALL. No morning sickness, no mood swings, no incessant peeing, no "just feeling" pregnant. My main symptom is that I'm tired -- make that exhausted -- almost all the time. I get sleepy at my desk in the middle of the day, I fall asleep on the couch around 9:30 every night and I wake up still tired.

That could have as much to do with being pregnant as with the fact that I've cut out caffeine cold-turkey. Or maybe it's because my baby is currently gaining 100 brain cells A MINUTE. Sure seems like that would zap some energy.

I'm still doing my same workouts (CrossFit three times a week, running two or three times a week) and can tell they take more out of me but I can still finish them fine. I asked my doctor about laying off the intensity of my workouts and he said it's totally fine to keep going at whatever level my body's already used to, so I'm going to stick with that for the foreseeable future.

This is a kind of an inconvenient time of year to have just found out I'm pregnant because it's cold and there are tons of holiday parties so normally I'd be drinking liberal amounts of coffee and wine. I don't mind giving them up, but I do feel like it will raise suspicions if anyone notices I'm drinking a lot of water and decaf coffee. If anyone calls me out it will be impossible to lie. I'm a terrible liar.

On the positive side, the holidays usually fly by, so my first trimester will be over before I know it (Christmas Eve).

Blueberry

2008-11-18T13:17:00.006-05:00

So I've decided to start yet another blog, this one documenting the baby that is currently masquereding as a blueberry-size bundle of cells in my stomach. This blog may become defunct in a few weeks when we go public with the pregnancy news, but on the other hand, it may not. I'd hate for my regular blog to become consumed with baby blabber because I know how boring that is to everyone else.

Let's see. Here's how it happened. Well, you know how it happened, but without going into THOSE details, here's how it went down. We started thinking about a baby last year and I went off the pill in preparation. I had been on the pill for about six or seven years, and more than a few of my friends who'd been on the pill for a similar length of time had found it took up to a year for them to start ovulating again. Sure enough, my body took until around April of this year to get back on a regular cycle, which surprised me, because I always take everything for granted.

By that time we were excited about the idea of having a baby because we'd found out Matt's brother and his wife were pregnant and due in November. Still, we told very few people we were trying. One of the people we did tell was Lib, who recommended a book called "Taking Charge of Your Fertility." It outlines "fertility awareness method," or FAM, which is simple to implement and effective for either avoiding or achieving pregnancy.

So now we knew how to time baby sex, but our plans kept being foiled! In April I was in New York with Mom and Amanda during the crucial days. In July we were sharing a two-bedroom beach condo with about a dozen other people and didn't have a moment alone. In September I was halfway across the country for work. It almost was the same story in October, but Matt managed to arrange a trip with his dad and brother to accomodate the baby-making window, and bingo -- 'twas a baby in my belly.